May 13, 2008
A Filmmaker Acts
Clive Ashenden (of Snatching Time notoriety) co-wrote, co-produced and starred in Code Grey, a 'tense thriller which morphs into a surreal comedy about perception', specifically made for the Straight8 Film Competition. It has just been selected for the Rushes Soho Shorts Festival and the world premier screening will be held in London in July. I knew those acting courses which Clive took at the City Cit would pay off one day!Posted by frances on May 13, 2008
May 9, 2008
Kwan Loong
I was having such pain in my hands when I was creating a new chapter on my laptop last week, I was worried I would have to stop writing altogether and use the voice recognition software a friend gave me. Instead, I had a Thai massage on my hands at the Paddington Sports Club. The massage was agony and I screamed the place down, but afterwards it was soothing to watch tennis ace, Martin Amis do his Captain Haddock act on Court One. (In the Old Days, Victor Lownes and the late Larry Adler used to play at the Club for money). The Thai masseuse warned me not to work for a couple of days after my massage, which was frustrating. My GP warned me the massage wouldn't do me any harm but said it probably wouldn't be effective and advised me just to rest. But, the Thai masseuse must have done something right, as I can now key-tap with no pain. I also invested in wrist supports and intermittently slosh some powerful Kwan Loong oil over my thumbs which I bought in China town. So far so good, as long as I remind myself to take breaks.Posted by frances on May 9, 2008
April 10, 2008
Art on the Underground
Somebody on the London Underground must read books from cover to cover. The Art on the Underground curator (Sally Shaw) has just told me they want to use extracts from my novels Frantic and Crushed in a book called "Piccadillyland", which will be distributed at both ends of the Piccadilly line (Heathrow Terminal 1,2 & 3, Cockfoster and Uxbridge) between June and December. Extracts from my books were chosen because I happened to mention several Piccadilly tube stations in my prose. The book will contain extracts from 120 authors, so I presume they all waxed lyrical about tube stations on the Piccadilly line!Posted by frances on April 10, 2008
March 10, 2008
Joseph Conrad cured my RSI
I swapped my vintage desktop for a laptop (a refurbished MacBook) recently, but after writing with my nose pressed against the screen for a few days, I was afflicted with a serious case of RSI in my right wrist. I was seriously considering investing in Voice Recognition software until a novelist friend with similar RSI problems, sent me a paragraph about Conrad which she spotted in a recent copy of the TLS:
".....therefore it comes as a shock, in reading the collected letters of Joseph Conrad to to read of the degree to which it (gout) afflicted this lean and grizzled figure. His attacks were frequent and severe, and though he didn't have a diagnosis until 1898, when 'gout or some other devil' SO INFLATED HIS WRIST THAT HE WAS UNABLE TO WRITE, (his legs had first began to swell soon after his return from the Congo.) It punctuated book after book, it broke his rhythym and kept him in bed incapable -- or so it seemed to him -- of writing anything but one letter of complaint after another. There were other illnesses. He never fully shook off malaria; his recurrent fevers would leave him shouting in Polish. There was dysentery, inlfuenza, angina eventually and some form of depression almost always. Both his children were desperately sick (and) ...Conrad was without enought cash to pay the doctor's bills. His wife Jessie lived in constant pain (undergoing a twenty year series of operations on her knees)."
(Meanwhile he wrote, among other things, Under Western Eyes, Heart of Darkness and Lord Jim).
After reading this, I was so cheered up, I have started to gingerly key-tap again. (Holding my wrist under scalding hot water for long periods helped too).
Posted by frances on March 10, 2008
February 5, 2008
Book Marketing enters the 21st century
I am sure that entrepreneurial authors who promote their books on the internet, could easily get a day job doing on line marketing for a conglomerate book publishing company. A story which caught my eye in today's e-bulletin of Book Trade Info was titled Marketing Has Never Been A Strength Of The Book Publishing Industry. It focuses on Random House of Canada's 'new' on line marketing strategy for one of their authors, Douglas Coupland who didn't want to do a book tour to promote "The Gum Thief", his latest title. The publishing company have come up with the 'novel' campaign of promotional videos on YouTube. Who knows? They might come up with the 'ingenious' idea of planning virtual book tours for their authors in future.
Posted by frances on February 5, 2008
November 22, 2007
Curator of Photographs with the Mostest
Popped into see the Pop Art Portraits exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery. Afterwards, Terence Pepper, the NPG's Curator of Photographs (he's also in Who's Who!) dragged me to a lecture on Tony Snowdon in the gallery and treated me to lunch.
I first met Terence at the late John Kobal's house decades ago and we've been friends ever since. I gave him a copy of Crushed and Frantic. In return, he gave me his gorgeous looking books: Angus McBean Portraits and Horst Portraits which I consider to be a very good barter indeed, especially when Terence reminded me he read the first draft of Frantic years ago. Terence, who is now curating the forthcoming Vanity Fair exhibition (and also completing a fully illustrated book to accompany the show) at the NPG in May 2008, showed me round the two displays of the current exhibition he has curated: the fascinating Born 1947-Camera Press at 60 (Tom Blau started the agency in 1947 and was the chief promoter of Karsh of Ottawa, before he represented Tony Snowdon, Patrick Lichfield, Norman Parkinson and all the other 'greats') and the Shutting Up Shop exhibition, which shows John Londei's unique snaps.
Posted by frances on November 22, 2007
November 5, 2007
Book Trade News
I was fascinated to read the Times' latest story on PDF, the 'troubled' literary and theatrical agency on Book Trade Info, the informative Book Trade News Digest which I receive by e-mail every morning. Twenty three of the firm's thirty six agents have departed, most of them to set up a new company, United Agents, which will start operating in the new year. According to the article on PDF's latest shenanigans, they have now hired two new agents, so this could be a good time for non-represented writers to get in there!?
Posted by frances on November 5, 2007
November 5, 2007
Elvis Gives Good Charity
Luckily, Elvis Costello is a good friend of Austin de Lone, my Mill Valley based musician brother-in-law: on November 8th, he has offered to give two concerts for free at the Great American Music Hall, a two-show benefit for the new nonprofit organisation, the Richard de Lone Housing Project. My nephew suffers from Prader-Willi Syndrome, a little-known chromosomal disorder that is the leading genetic cause of morbid obesity. (See today's article in the San Francisco Chronicle).
Elvis and Austin have known each other since 1987, when Austin played keyboards with Elvis's touring band, the Confederates after their mutual friend Nick Lowe introduced them. Austin suggested that Elvis play his entire debut album, My Aim Is True at the benefit concert. They have even rounded up most of the musicians from Clover, the band who backed Elvis in 1977. [The original line-up included Huey Lewis]. Although they were one of the top country/rock outfits of that era, and reputedly one of the best bands Marin County ever produced, they couldn't get a break in England. Not surprising. I did see them play at the Hammersmith Palais around this time, but their music seemed archaic then. The audience were mainly interested in punk. All we wanted to see was the mesmeric Wilko Johnson, the then guitarist with Dr Feelgood, who appeared with a giant safety pin in his lips and wowed us into musical oblvion. Clover did not.
Austin is opening both shows with Bill Kirchen, and I was just about to book a return ticket to San Francisco in order to see the show, when I was told not to bother as both concerts are a sell out.
Posted by frances on November 4, 2007
October 19, 2007
World Book Day
The Mairfair Library contacted me today. They have booked me in for a library talk about Crushed on World Book Day next March!
Posted by frances on October 19, 2007
October 7, 2007
Transfigured Nights
I first met David Blyth, the talented New Zealand film director and scriptwriter when his horror classic, "Death Warmed Up" freaked out the London Film Festival audience in 1984.
Now, his latest film, "Transfigured Nights", an original, funny and extremely futuristic 48 minute short promises to do the same. It has just been selected to be part of Lausanne Underground Film and Music Festival's international film programme which takes place from October 10th to 14th.
The film's blurb says it's 'a 48-minute experimental documentary that explores the wildly perverse, fetishistic pleasures of web cam mask performance.
Director David Blyth takes us into the cyber-homes of a variety of men who show their extreme-sexually charged online behind-the-mask personas...
From the Rubber-encased, Gas-masked MORE RUBBER PLEASE SIR, to the extreme 7-layered, gigantic boobed, and bound HOG-TIED, to the sensual asphyxiation bags of the doll-masked KUNIKO, to the forbidden and haunting Berkha-attired DEEBA, and the hysterically happy ex-Vietnam Vet goodtime gal MISS PIGGY, who wears Pig masks, and cocktail frocks, and twirls topless around her glamour-filled home.
The film, entirely captured from Internet sources, openly explores the new sexuality of the digital age ... and like forbidden videos its impact will be shocking for the honesty it portrays, and hopefully liberating to the world audience at large...'
David will be attending the Lausanne Underground Film Festival, as "Transfigured Nights" has caused an international buzz. Other attendees at the film festival will include early Warhol satellites, Holly Woodlawn and Mary Warnov.
Posted by frances on October 7, 2007
October 6, 2007
An Eureka Moment
I've just had a(nother) therapeutic break in Aldeburgh for a few days. The Suffolk seaside town is still reminiscent of the Fifties, so apart from an insidious sprinkling of second homes, it remains unspoilt. I stayed at the Wentworth, a comfortable hotel owned by Michael Pritt. He inherited it from his parents several years ago, and has got such a marvellous taste in decor, his hotel reminded me of an Agatha Christie film.
The food was fabulous, especially the enormous three course evening meal. One guest ate so much, she got stuck in the bath after dinner and had to be pulled out by one of the waitresses.
When I wasn't playing golf at the Aldeburgh golf club (I'll always be eternally grateful to Keith Preston, the club's pro for giving me my swing), I sat on my room's balcony and stared at the sea. The sound of the waves was so soothing, I even found myself verbally communicating with a corpulent seagull! I also had an eureka moment and managed to mentally solve 'Act 2' of my work-in-progress novel, which I've been having 'difficulty' with.
The holiday was a real rest until the nightmarish journey home. The saga: the M12 was closed, so I resorted to asking a helpful lorry driver parked in a lay-by for directions. (I took out my notebook and) he advised a long detour to Newmarket before driving back to London. The journey from Suffolk to London took almost five hours, but it was worth it. At least I think I've cracked the plot of my new novel!
Posted by frances on October 6, 2007
September 21, 2007
An Inspirational Holiday
I've just been incarcerated in a friend's luxurious villa near Marbella for a week (my holiday reminded me of 'Darling'). I had my own roof terrace, so every night before I went to bed, I lay down flat on the floor and viewed the stars. Inspirational! I got a lot of fresh ideas for my new novel, so it was worth going away just for that!
Posted by frances on September 21, 2007
September 11, 2007
Storm Trojan
I'm officially an Ezine 'author expert', which means I can submit an unlimited amount of Ezine articles for publication on the net. To date, most of my articles have been about the Seventies, to help promote Frantic, my novel about the 'nostalgic' '70's.
Google Alerts alert me when one of my Ezine articles is published by another site or blog (to date, 531 times). To my horror, some of my articles, which have been published on Google owned blogger.com have recently been desecrated by porn links. Naturally, I have left 'I object to this' type of comment on the 'offending' blogs. I suspect that Google don't care what bloggers say in their blogs though. Their policing is provided by readers who flag 'objectionable' articles. But, so many of my articles have been doctored now, I suspect that I'm a victim of Storm Trojan. Sob!
Posted by frances on September 11, 2007
September 10, 2007
A Plug for Super8
Frustrated feature film directors waiting to get the 'Green Light' for their projects can always keep their hand in by entering Super8 competitions, which director Nick Scott did with "The Other Half", his entry for the straight8 competition for short films shot on Super8 film. It was selected as one of the winners and was screened at an 'exclusive presentation' at the Kodak Pavillion during this year's Cannes Film Festival. My friend Clive Ashenden (of Snatching Time fame) who worked on it, told me he did 'a bit of everything. Nick was the director, but I contributed to the writing, the camera operating (Super8mm/16mm/Mini DV), offered technical advice and whatever was needed to get the film in the can. What was nice was that it was a real group effort - and that it came out so well.'
There's now going to be a Raindance screening of "The Other Half" on Thursday October 4th. Also, Nick Scott's amusing documentary, "Making of 'The Other Half'" can now be viewed on YouTube. For people who thought that the art of Super8 was extinct, Click on Part One and Part Two to see how it's done!
Posted by frances on September 10, 2007
August 25, 2007
Jeff Schubert Dictates
Met Jeff Schubert, a fascinating Australian economist, business consultant and writer for a drink in Jermyn Street this afternoon. He was in England to meet a publisher for a spin-off book to "Dictatorial CEOs & their Lieutenants - inside the Executive Suites of Napoleon, Stalin, Ataturk, Mussolini, Hitler and Mao," his book about 'the dictators who have put their stamp on the world in the past two centuries'. His controversial and thought-provoking book, which has a Foreword by Bob Johnston, Former Governor of the Reserve Bank of Australia has had heavyweight reviews since its publication in October.
'Jeff Schubert is well known for lateral thinking about big issues affecting the world... This book provides exciting insights into some of the most important, enthralling and appalling figures that have shaped the world,' comments Professor Ross Garnut, ANU, Professor of Economics and former Australian Ambassador to China.
In complete juxtaposition, Jeff also writes a delightful blog called The Little Pink Ant which consists of his original children's stories, uniquely illustrated by Antoinette Starkiewicz, a Sydney based animator. There is no justice in this world if this blog isn't published in hard copy book form and also turned into an animated movie. Jeff, who is now going to Moscow to work for a while, wrote the stories 'for the enjoyment' of Anastasia, his ten year old daughter who lives in Russia.
Posted by frances on August 25, 2007
August 23, 2007
Film4 Sponsors Horror
Film4 is sponsoring FrightFest (held at the Odeon West End) for the first time this year. Even though Film4 isn't a horror channel, Jeff Ford, Director of Acquisitions and Film4 says, 'The genre has always been a crucial part of our programming. In the past, with our Extreme strand, and now, with our weekly Saturday Night Shocks showcase, Film 4 has championed exactly the sort of filmmaking that's the lifeblood of FrightFest.'
Alan Jones, one of the festival's founders is an old friend. When I was a film critic in 'The Old Days', we saw each other every night at screenings and even did interviews together. Once, we attended a press conference at a West End hotel for the actor, Tony Perkins who was promoting "Psycho 11". Alan, ever the 'investigative reporter' asked Perkins how one of the special effects was done. Perkins erupted with fury. 'People like you are responsible for ruining the film industry,' he ranted.
For old time's sake, Alan invited me to see Black Sheep, a New Zealand offering which opened the festival. Alan used to live in jeans and a horror logo T shirt, the uniform of a dedicated horror fanatic. Tonight, he was running around in a pinstripe suit, supposedly because he is now part of the establishment due to Channel 4's sponsorship. Clive Ashenden, whose award winning short, Snatching Time was shown at the horror festival last year remarked he had never seen Alan in a suit before. Many of the FrightFest hardcore fans were genuinely horrified. Incidentally, the FrightFest team asked to see Clive's original new short, "Gunplay", which was shown at Cannes this year, but Clive had to warn them it wasn't horror.
Black Sheep might have come off quickly in New Zealand, but the FrightFest audience loved it, laughing uproariously at the explicit gore. After the movie, which was a 'homage' to horror classics like "An American Werewolf in London", Joe Dante's "The Howling" and George Romero's "Night Of The Living Dead", Alan interviewed Jonathan King, the young writer/director on stage. He insinuated (was he joking?) there might be sequels similar to Romero's trilogy, 'Night', 'Dawn' and 'Day'. One of the organisers proceeded to throw sheep masks into the audience and one fell into my lap!
Posted by frances on August 23, 2007
August 3, 2007
A reunion with Adrian George
Adrian George, the painter was my Svengali in the late Seventies: he was responsible for my becoming a journalist. I haven't seen him for years, so was euphoric when he contacted me this morning at the crack of dawn. He asked if I would like a drawing he did of me three decades ago.
'Yes, yes, yes,' I screamed.
He explained he was clearing out his plan chest and was giving away pictures to friends.
'I want to spread a little happiness,' he quipped.
I ran over to his Kensington flat in order to collect my drawing, as soon as he put the phone down. It was so nostalgic to see him again. Adrian used to be a sardonic reprobate. Thankfully, he's still sardonic but is now domesticated instead of being louche. Since I last saw him, he's become a grandfather to Joshua's kids (his eldest son), and now has two more children - Jack Apollo and Joe Bacchus by his concubine, Amanda. The children both go to The Lycee and during their leisure hours make original films together, which Adrian proudly showed me on his iBook. Jack, his twelve year old directs and writes the music, while little Joe sings.
I sat on Adrian's red and gold French late eighteenth century sofa - his 'bordello sofa' is how he described it, while I flicked through 'Carnival of Desire', his coffee table book about his last exhibition in London and also his book, Adrian George's Paris in August, which is soon going to be reprinted. I also viewed his press cuttings of the time when he travelled all over the world for the Times and Sunday Times, writing articles and doing illustrations of the countries he chose to visit. In the end, he had to stop as he ran out of new countries to see.
In return for the drawing, I gave Adrian a copy of Frantic and Crushed and asked him to tell me what he thinks of my illustrations. I'll have to wait until September for his verdict as he's now taking his family to (his flat in) Paris for the whole of August.
I've now hung his lovely drawing on the wall in front of my computer in my office. It makes the room.
Posted by frances on August 3, 2007
July 27, 2007
Seggiano
Austin de Lone, my brother-in-law was in town, and I'm so glad that Peri Eagleton and her partner David Harrison came for dinner. They brought a bulging crate of their delicious Seggiano foods and extra virgin oils from their farm in Tuscany. Their stuff is stocked everywhere including the recently opened Whole Foods in High Street Kensingon. After dinner, Austin played songs from his new "Soul Blues" album on his ukulele. He's a wonderful songwriter and his scorching new song, "Love Songs For Losers" inspired me to dance wildly round the room. Not a good idea, as I had unwisey overdosed on Seggiano's irresistible, Calabrian fig balls for desert.
Posted by frances on July 27, 2007
July 12, 2007
The late Nigel Dempster
I couldn't help feeling nostalgic today when I heard that another Seventies icon has expired. Nigel Dempster, my old mentor has finally died - reportedly from a wasting disease called Progressive Supranuclear Palsy (according to the Fleet Street orbituaries, he was sixty five). When I became a gossip columnist on 'Ritz Newspaper' in the late Seventies, he was the diary editor on the Daily Mail. He was one of the first people I went to interview - in his office at the Mail. From then on, we became 'best friends'.
He even got me into the NUJ and I shall 'always remember' going to collect the signed application form from him in the Private Eye office. At the time, the 'Greatest Living Englishman' wrote a column called 'Grovel' for the satirical rag. Richard Ingrams (Lord Gnome) who was the editor at the time offered to second me for the NUJ, but I declined. I wanted a friend to do it, so I asked Maggie Koumi - then editor of '19' magazine to second me. (She later became editor on 'Hello' magazine). I was a film critic at the time and Maggie and I sat next to each other every night at preview screenings.
I used to see Nigel day in, night out as we were both invited to the same events. Once, (Sir) Dai Llewellyn invited all the Fleet Street gossip columnists and myself to a dinner at Wedgies, a Kings Road club which he ran. I was the only woman, but I still don't understand why Dai greeted us in fancy dress: a corset, black stockings and suspender belts when we arrived. Nigel didn't show. The hacks were so jealous, they spent the entire evening bitching about him, accusing him of being grand. Yes, Nigel and I were friends for years until he turned on me. But, he did that with a lot of his associates. A story was more important to him than friendship, and many a bewildered friend of his couldn't understand why he betrayed them in his columns in the Daily Mail and the Mail on Sunday. He was the consummate gossip columnist. For him, a story always came first.
Posted by frances on July 12, 2007
July 9, 2007
My First Blog Interview
Danette Bocage, a 27 year old 'girl' in Hawaii was the first person to send me a fan letter after reading Crushed. About a month ago, she interviewed me (she's an on line book reviewer) and today my words of wisdom appeared on DCL. I received an e-mail from her this morning, informing me we'll be chatting on her blog today. She's ten hours behind London, so I presume that her 'today' means tonight my end. I see that Kara Noble, property queen (Noble Apartments) has added a Comment with a lovely review.
Posted by frances on July 9, 2007
June 28, 2007
Internet Radio Interview
I've just been booked in to do my first internet radio interview (about Crushed) on a radio show called "All Things That Matter" on PIVTR in September. Snag is, the station is in Maine which is five hours behind London. The interviewer, a writer called Philip Harris will be interviewing me at 3 p.m. their time, I must remind myself nearer the time not to go to sleep before 1 a.m.
Posted by frances on June 28, 2007
June 18, 2007
I Know What I Like
Helen Ralli is an art student who designed the eye-catching cover for Crushed. They do say that a book is judged by its cover, which probably explains why my Young Adult novel is out on permanent loan at Westminster libraries.
Helen has just received a distinction for her work during her foundation course at Camberwell College of Arts, so John Ralli, her father and I went to inspect his daughter's new offering at the college's end of year preview.
I didn't know what to expect when Helen handed me a pair of headphones before I entered her "Restaurant" titled installation. (She later told me she was inspired after eating a 'weird' meal at Dans le Noir, where the food in the pitch black restaurant is served by blind waiters). I certainly didn't expect to enter a tunnel of darkness, and while I was listening to the explicitly clear voice giving instructions on my headphones, I panicked. I found the experience so disorientating, that I yelled for Helen to come inside to rescue me.
Luckily, the person who went in after me (a modern art aficionado called Damien Kelly) enlightened me when he emerged.
"Helen's simple but clever concept of participative art provided an eerie but thoroughly enjoyable six minute adventure. The challenge was to do a number of specified drawings on a single sheet using three different coloured crayons. The crayons were identifiable only by different markings. The concept provided an eerie insight into the a blind world. I imagine the task would have been a piece of cake for blind people but for the normally sighted it produced an amazing jumble of artistic colours and shapes which were displayed in an adjacent booth. This was participative art at its best and most enjoyable. Helen Ralli is indeed a name to watch out for."
Helen has now been accepted onto Camberwell's three year BA(Hons) Graphic Design degree course next year, so he might be right.
I would love to have explored "Restaurant" again, but unfortunately there were too many people waiting outside to go in.
Posted by frances on June 19, 2007
June 15, 2007
Queens Park Library
I gave a talk about Crushed to a sprawling class of Year 6 kids from Wilberforce Primary School at Queens Park Library (a beautiful and spacious building) today. Their teacher who described my novel as 'eccentric', said the kids had read the first chapter at school. The kids weren't sure what the word 'eccentric' meant, but they seemed to appreciate what they had read and asked incredibly intelligent questions. After the kids lined up to get my autograph at the end, the librarian informed me that someone had stolen their last copy of Crushed, which I thought was flattering.
Roopa Farooki is giving a talk at the library on Monday 30th July at around 6.15 p.m. Her first novel, "Bitter Sweets" was shortlisted for the Orange prize for new writers. Don't all rush now!
Posted by frances on June 15, 2007
June 13, 2007
Gong
Simon Maxwell is the director of the Overseas Development Institute, Britain's leading independent think-tank on international development and humanitarian policy (whatever that means?). He's also my cousin. He writes witty (global) despatches like this one on Open Democracy. The Queen gave him a CBE at Buckingham Palace for his efforts this morning, and afterwards he treated friends and family to a 'Grande bouffe' lunch at RSJ, a restaurant in Waterloo. A civil servant at the lunch said that Tony Blair only has time to read the first paragraph of ten page memos, so it's comforting to know that it's not only producers and agents who have the same reading habit.
Posted by frances on June 13, 2007
May 31, 2007
Meet The Agents
A film director friend once paid me bucks to write a screenplay. But it ultimately didn't get made after I was forced to churn out 'several' new drafts in an exhausting short period of time. After that 'disappointing' experience, I decided screenwriting was too competitive and decided to stick to writing novels!
I currently have a TV writing partner though, so I thought it would be interesting to check out the 'Meet the Agents' evening at the Writers' Guild's headquarters in Kings Cross. The agents were screenwriting/TV/Radio and theatre ones: Julian Friedmann of Blake Friedmann chaired the Question and Answer session. His fellow agents were Meg Davis of MBA (she also represents fiction writers), Howard Gooding of Judy Daish Associates and Matthew Dench of The Dench Arnold Agency. It was fascinating to hear the writers' publicly air their grievances, but it was frightening that so many writers at the meeting with lengthy script credits don't have agents. What was more frightening, all the agents present said that they each take on one new client a year - if that. But, one of the agents came up with an 'ingenious' solution: 'become agents in order to submit your own work.'
One desperate writer said her radio play had been finally submitted to the BBC Head of Drama after it had languished in the BBC's Writer's Room for months. Unfortunately for her, he turned it down. It was her last chance.
'Do you write Murder Mysteries?' Julian asked her. 'Get rid of the Head of Drama,' he then quipped which raised a few laughs. But the rest of the agents' offerings weren't funny at all.
'There are more writers trying to write than agents,' Julian proclaimed. 'Writers have got to stand up for themselves,' he added.
'You've got to network for yourself,' all the agents agreed.
Is that why the scheduled half an hour after the question and answer session was euphemistically described as 'Networking'? I made an effort and cornered Meg Davis, resisting the compulsion to throttle her. It wasn't her fault, but another agent at her agency turned down my first novel centuries ago.
Posted by frances on May 31, 2007
May 25, 2007
David Hockney's Largest Painting ever
I bumped into David Graves, David Hockney's London assistant in Piccadilly this morning. He promptly invited me to pop into the Royal Academy: Hockney was giving press interviews about his painting, 'Bigger Trees near Warter', which is part of the Summer exhibition (opens June 11). It's the largest painting that the Royal Academy has ever hung in the exhibition. And, it's also the biggest painting that Hockney has ever done (he painted it outdoors in Yorkshire). It hangs in the Academy's largest gallery.
I pity the artists (poor buggers) who have to share a room with the massive work. Nobody is going to look at their stuff as the painting swamps/hogs the room. And, it only took David one month to paint. He also used digital photography so that he could see the progress of the picture on his computer during its work-in-progress stage.
The 'world's greatest living artist' was being interviewed by Andrew Marr, the journalist and political commentator, who was once painted by Hockney. The room was otherwise empty and it was such a treat to view his colossal work without a sea of heads bobbing in front of me. I'm no art critic, but I preferred viewing the painting from further away, as close up, the 'joins' of the fifty separate canvasses which make up the painting distracted me from getting into the picture.
'Did you get the Guardian, luv?' David asked me.
After I had finished my luxurious private view, I ran out and invested 70p in the rag. A photograph of his painting had a centre spread. Let's face it, the pic was too gigantic for one page!
Posted by frances on May 25, 2007
May 24, 2007
Diana Hammond
Had an inspirational lunch with Diana Hammond, the writer today. (She used to live in Hollywood making a 'fortune', writing screenplays). She lives in Paris but popped over to London to check out all five floors of Waterstones in the morning. I adored her novel, The Impersonator so much, I put it on one of my Amazon Listomania lists.
Diana is currently writing a new novel (I can't wait to read it) and says she never shows her project to anyone until after she's finished it. She's wise. In the past, whenever I showed my work during its work-in-progress stage, I've had disastrous results. I had to abort my last novel as I actually allowed an unpublished 'friend' with editorial aspirations to give me notes after I showed him each chapter. When I finished the novel, I realised it was predominately his input not mine. Luckily, I was able to salvage my contributions for my new book.
Posted by frances on May 24, 2007
May 17, 2007
MySpace
If you click on a writer's site on MySpace, you get to view the trailer of their latest book. One advantage of clicking on a favourite Musician's site is hearing samples of their music. I just clicked on Austin de Lone's's new site and was rewarded with hearing downloadable tracks from his new SOUL BLUES album (out in June).
Posted by frances on May 17, 2007
May 12, 2007
Pimlico Children's Library
Pimlico Children's Library is teamed with Chelsea FC in the Premier League Reading Stars (PLRS). The programme is a partnership between the National Literacy Trust, the Football Foundation and the Premier League and is supported by the Arts Council and Waterstones. The scheme is also linked with Reading is Fundemental.
The scheme encourages children aged 7 to 11 years to read books by using football and a football player icon as an inspiration. Each premier league football club is teamed with two or three libraries and a professional football player icon is chosen from the team to represent the club. The footballer then chooses a book to recommend. The combined 20 player's choices makes up the PLRS reading list.
The Football Foundation will supply a selection of books from the reading list, fund one author visit and the football club will arrange a visit to the stadium for a tour. If children complete the scheme, they are given a PLRS certificate and fifteen pounds worth of books to begin their personal collection. A good incentive to start reading.
This morning, I did my little bit about trying to encourage kids to read. I gave a talk about Crushed, my illustrated Young Adult novel at the Pimlico Children's Library. The library had tried to borrow a copy of my book from another Westminster library before the talk, but they were all out, being borrowed. I was hoping to inspire the kids to start reading voraciously, by recommending favourite children's books (Frances Hodgson Burnet's "The Secret Garden" was one example) and droning on about my highs and lows as a writer.
I was a bit worried that Crushed had nothing to do with football, but it didn't seem to matter. Although some of the kids were lacking in literary skills - one ten year old boy confessed he had never read a book - they were all bright and curious. Apparently, they're not used to meeting authors, so I hastened to tell them that anyone can be a writer. I stressed it's not necessary to pass an exam in order to write. I didn't disillusion my young audience that writing can be the hardest job in the world. Let them find out for themselves I thought, as I cajoled them into starting writing for fun.
Posted by frances on May 12, 2007
May 10, 2007
University Of The Arts London
Dug out my Celia Birtwell blouse from TopShop. Went to the Banqueting House in Whitehall tonight for the University of Arts London Conferments Ceremony. The Honorary Doctors' gong recipients were mostly in the fashion and designer fields. Georgio Armani and Jonathan Ive CBE RDI (his official title is Senior Vice President of Industrial Design at Apple Inc) weren't at the ceremony, which was a shame. I would love to have molested Ive, who deigned my old Sunflower Mac. Recipients who did attend the ceremony included Celia Birtwell, who was made an honorary doctor for being 'Britain's most valued and influential textile designer,' Joan Burstein (CBE), who owns Browns, Tom Dixon (OBE) Head of international design at Habitat, Joshua Galvin, a hairdresser and Mona Hatoum who does installations (I had to Google Search the last three to see who they were). The robed recipients' 'I am so honoured' speeches' were short and sweet, but Mona Hatoum, who was gonged last recited her entire C.V. which was a shame, as by this time our seats were incredibly uncomfortable.
Throughout the ceremony, I looked at the ceiling painted by Rubens, and wondered why more writers weren't made honorary doctors of University of Arts London. Admittedly, past Honorary Fellows include (Dame) AS Byatt, but maybe the absence of 'honoured' writers in their droves is due to the fact that University of Arts London consists of a conglomerate of art colleges: Cambwerwell College of Arts, Central St Martins, Chelsea College of Art and Design, London College of Communication, London College of Fashion and Wilbledon College of Art.
Posted by frances on May 10, 2007
May 4, 2007
Promoting on Amazon
I'm trying to beef up my Profile Page on Amazon.com. I haven't got round to blogging or 'plogging' on my Profile Page yet, so I decided to post a brief 'So, You'd Like To' (give a talk about a Young Adult novel) article instead. Initially, I carefully followed Amazon.com's instructions for the simple coding on how to insert my ISBN number for Crushed, my YA novel in my article. Amazon instructs you to key-tap 'ASIN' instead of ISBN if you have an ISBN number. At the time, I didn't realise that an Amazon ASIN is the same as an ISBN-10 number. So each time I tried inserting my ISBN-13 number into my copy, the link didn't work.
I was just about to pull all my hair out, when in desperation, I e-mailed/queried Publishing and Promoting about my dilemma. The site, which deals with the 'final stages of book production and pre- and post-release marketing' gives useful tips for book promotion and publicity. A group member immediately replied, advising me to type my obsolete ISBN 10 number instead of the new ISBN 13 one. Thankfully, It worked!
Posted by frances on May 4, 2007
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